Terrence's

Caught

2008-07-14T15:48:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah.

I shall close down my blog here one fine day..

One fine day perhaps.

see you people.

Enjoy life!

2008-07-06T19:50:00.002+08:00

Workload is madness.
I need a break
I need i need.
Ugh.
Fuck it la.
Sigh.

2008-07-02T18:25:00.000+08:00

I can't believe where i found this.
But it's so darn true

Dont be upset when he did not fulfill his promise, as long as he's with you, both of you can realise it together.
Dont hurt him when he fails you or insist your way, because in his heart he wanted as much to give u what you wish for...As much as it disappoints you, it has already hurt his pride that he cant give you what you wish for. Have patience, because he will surprise you one day.
Dont compare him with someone else, while you are engrossed in thinking how well someone else is having their wishes fulfiled. Think about what are the wonderful things he has done for this relationship which others have not.
Dont expect too much in material fulfillment, because when you lost him, even the most beautiful dress, bag or item which you have been eyeing have lost its appeal. You will realise you need him more than anything Money can deliver.
Dont ignore him when you have company, because when you lost him, no amount of consolation and company from people can ever compare having to see his face..even from afar.Dont make him wait because you have only this lifetime to know this man whom u love. You will never know when will be your last...
When you quarrel, be the first to apologise no matter whose fault is it. Love is not a competition on who wins, who's right or wrong. Apologise first because you respect him. When you lost him, you will realise you miss even quarrelling with him.
Dont say words that hurt him even though he upsets you, because he was after all the man you have love and care for...To experience hurt from someone you love is more pain than a knife cutting through your flesh.
Dont forget to tell him you love him everyday. As day past we have taken these words for granted...when you lost him, these most simple 3 words becomes something you have yearned so much to tell him.
Dont forget to praise him for all the wonderful things he has done, it takes alot of effort and time for him to find a way to make you smile..
Dont be upset if he cant send you home or call you, because as long as you have him...there will always be tomorrows you can meet each other again...
Dont be upset if he can only send you by public transport, when you lost the one you love most, the only companion you have on the journey home are strangers..
Dont be angry if he provide comments that you dont find pleasant because only those who truly love you will be honest...
Dont be upset with his parents, because you will realise without them, you will never have met him.
Dont be jealous if he's nice to his friends or family, because you will soon realise you are with the most wonderful person.
Dont be upset why you have to stay home with him and not have the opportunity to go out, because when you lost him, you will realise those malls or places you wanted to go are no longer a happy place, all you want is to have him beside you no matter where you are...even just doing nothing...
Dont leave him because you think you can find happiness in someone else...when you lost your love.. you realise no one other than him can withstand all the hardships with you.
No amount of riches, luxury, diamonds, fancy holidays, nice cars, clothes, makeup can ever conceal that emptiness in your heart if you have lost him....
Smile more to him.. Tell him you love him today if you havent, Praise him, care for him..Hug him tight and tell him you will never want to let go... Respect , trust him, support him..Hold his hands, kiss them & tell him these are the hands you want to hold for a life time....Look into his eyes and tell him "Will you be my bf and be the love of my lifetime again..."

2008-07-01T15:30:00.001+08:00

Today was super weird.
I slept for 5 freaking periods.
teachers didnt say a thing.
i think they gave up on me.
oral's tomorrow for many people
all the best.
7th.

2008-06-30T16:14:00.001+08:00

School is really boring me out.
Its not as if i have not enough problems already.
Heck. I'm so screwed.
i am sorry, i really am.
please. stop thinking like that. it hurts

2008-06-28T11:14:00.002+08:00

Too tired to be bothered about anything.
Maybe its the end of the road.
Headache.
Fuck it. Sickening
See you.

2008-06-26T14:54:00.002+08:00

Sick today.
Missed school.
Injured ankle.
I'm walking like a duck.
Some stuffs happening in the family.
What good is a house
if you can't rest your spirits.
What good is a family
when all they do is put you down.
What good are relationships
when people get hurt all the time.
What good is school
when they don't teach you how to deal with issues in life.
What good is life
when everything sucks.
Somehow i miss many things.
4 more days.
can i see you soon?
i miss you =D

2008-06-25T20:00:00.001+08:00

I miss you.
Why do you seem so far?

2008-06-24T20:50:00.004+08:00

Anger.
I feel and i yield to it.
Regretfully, many things have happened.
How i wish swallowing everything is that easy.

Boredom.
It strikes me all the time.
They say don't waste time.
I say it's a way to pass time.

Concern.
I try to show it.
I don't think i receive it.
Especially from them.
Concern my ass.
That's plain selfishness.

Direction.
I desperately need some directions in life.
More then too often, i am stuck at the same spot.
Why??

Esteem.
I don't deny it, being the egoistic kind,
Being trampled upon sucks.
Low-Esteem. Alas! Tough battle.

Future.
its a burden. One of the biggest in fact.
Its a chore. Its a person's life.
I can't see myself in the next 5 years.

God.
I believe and I pray.

Help.
I need help. Needless to elaborate i feel.

I
Me is I.
I is Me.
I need my identity.
In fact, I don't really know who i am anymore

Joy.
A gift.
A mystery.
A tangible feeling.
Inexpressible

Karma
Do you believe in it?
Its one area i want to understand

Love.
Many different kinds.
Many different ways to express.
A simple I love you.
Could make one's day.
Its a wide word.
Various feelings
Very easily misunderstood.

Melody.
Melody. I believe life is like that.
Your own melody.
Smooth? Rough?
You compose it yourself.
Your music.
Your masterpiece.

Night
The most beautiful time ever.
Other then times when it rains.
The cooling feeling is good man!
Shiok!

O's.
sickening topic.
One of my worse fears.
worse regrets.
worse worse. Ugh!
Everything seems screwed up when its this topic.

Patience
Its a virtue.
Famous saying.
Heck, then i think this virtue only exists at certain times.
Not all the time.
especially in me

Questions.
Questions, Queries.
Many of which unanswered.
It hurts! It hurts.
Questions.
It makes one feel empty at times.

Rachel.
RRRRRRRRRRR
Loves!

Silence.
breaking away from many things.
Silencing myself from certain things.
Yet breaking the silence in other areas of life.

Talent.
Yet to be Uncovered.
Yet to be drawn to its full potential.

Unfailing.
Let me give that unfailing love.
Let me feel it.
Unfailing.
Never failing.
All areas of life.
Unfailing. Its something i want to achieve.

Vexed
Burdened.
Stress out.
Vexed.

Win.
A win.
What win.
To emerge victorious at the end.
This leg of the race.
I yearn to win.
My spirit is urging me on.
I need to end it well.

X-ed.
Kinda hate being X-ed by people.
As in AXED.

Zeal.
I lack alot of it.
People go hey! must be zealous for studies.
Must show some Zeal!

2008-06-24T17:31:00.002+08:00

Tuesday is always superb because i end school a 2.
and i get to go home after that.
focus test on friday.
oral.
lol. wonder test what sia.
LOL
yeah. bored.
so bored.
freaking bored.
I want friday to come quick.
AMP AMP AMP.
haha. heard from mummy dee its EXPLOSIVE.
can't wait.
eh idiot. come home quick.
imy!!

2008-06-23T23:03:00.002+08:00

Its been a crazy year so far.
As time flies, I worry too.
I suppose things have never been right
Ever since last year.
I kinda regret.
What's the point regretting now?
Well, I don't know.
As i take a closer and more deeper look in life.
Guess what?
I see people.
Yes. People.
Burdened by troubles.
Happy at times.
I notice a lot of things.
I tend to see and feel a lot
Realising how much i myself take things for granted at times.
I have a wonderful girlfriend.
I realise my true potential.
My true friends.
What more could i ask for?
To be honest, there are many more things one could ask for.
Heck, It kinda bothers me sometimes.
More responsibilities. Increase in Workload
Sometimes when problems like these arises.
Sigh! We will never hear the end of it.
Tennis Tennis i need some TENNIS!

Rummaging through the old songs in my computer
Hits from the 70's 80's.
One of my all-time favourites
Beatles and Eagles!
Let it be & Take it easy
easily 2 of the better songs ever.
It really soothes me in one way or another

Then there's P&W.
One of my personal favourites.

AT THE CROSS

Oh Lord You've searched me
You know my way
Even when I fail You
I know You love me

Your holy presence
Surrounding me
In every season
I know You love me
I know You love me

At the cross I bow my knee
Where Your blood was shed for me
There's no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now

You go before me
You shield my way
Your hand upholds me
I know You love me

At the cross I bow my knee
Where Your blood was shed for me
There's no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now?(x2)

You tore the veil
You made a way
When You said that it is done(x2)

And when the earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me
I know You love me
Oh.. I know You love me

At the cross I bow my knee
Where your blood was shed for me
There's no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now?(x2)

You tore the veil
You made a way
When You said that it is done(x4)

Well, that religion question came out.
Whatever it is, I am a CATHOLIC.
I am proud of my faith.
I will defend it.
I can't stand by and watch things happen.
I can't pretend that some things are ok.
Well, I am a catholic through and through.
You cant change that.
Sigh!
Alas, I am sure God has plans.
I shall not worry myself too much.
ALL SMILES TO YOU!
I LOVE MY PAPA UP THERE!
I LOVE MY R DEAREST.
i know i will be fine.
=D

Life is a mystery.
Hard to comprehend.
Yet easily understood.
Funny? Queer?
You bet it is.

Pissed-

2008-06-23T17:19:00.006+08:00

I hate the fucking talk.
The usual you could have been taking O's talk.
First day in school after hols.
Fuck it.
I know i screwed up. so?
I know it myself.
That's enough.
Just screw off from me if you ain't here to help.
And to someone.
Just lay off me asshole.
I will punch your frigging balls.
Oh. Drank hard liquor in School.
Not bad at all.
alcohol smoothes pain.
I miss R! lots and lots.

2008-06-22T21:27:00.000+08:00

Evening wasted.
School tomorrow.
I do miss you alot.

2008-06-21T23:37:00.002+08:00

the silence is deafening i know
we will be fine
i love you

School is starting.
I'm sure it won't be a happy time for me.
Workload will be multiplied.
Rest and Slacking are off the charts.
I wish i had more time this holidays.
It passed so quickly.
Homework. Homework.
Well, I had my fair share of fun i guess.
Exams Exams, alas! The fate of a student.
This is bad, my brain has malfunctioned.
Due to excessive wine and misses.
but by the grace of god i will be fine.
Alright! Terrence says he wanna try studying for a change.
Let's see how it works out.
Shit, my dad's looking, gotta go soon.

To my dearest girl.
there are times where i hurt you.
I understand and i am sorry.
I know you know i know you know.
Erm. yeah? ok. i admit. that was anti-climax.
yeah well, 10 more days to lucky 7th.
I will be here always.
I Love you!

2008-06-20T23:20:00.002+08:00

Holidays are drawing to a close, the amount of homework can kill off the remaining braincells left in my brain. Today was not too bad, movie with my poink poink at je. yeap. did abit of homework at subway.
cool. not cool.
nearly died staring at the maths.
heck. i don't know who's sitting for O's man.
Haha.
Wedding tomorrow.
Yay! yeap.
I have 1 min to finish my post because of that poink poink.
cya.
I love my poink poink girlfriend

2008-06-19T12:42:00.002+08:00

Wine.

More Wine.

Oh frapp.

The winds are blowing against me.

Well, What to do.

Its a mystery.

It's a wonder.

It's a gift.

That Girl.

haha.

Crap.

I bet u have no idea what i am talking about.

Neither do i.

It doesnt matter to me. Just be happy. And i will be.

I love my R!

2008-06-17T18:17:00.001+08:00

There are so many doubts in life.

This and That.

Here and There.

Well, you guys get it right?

Well, school is re-opening soon.

Heck. Well.

I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND

2008-06-16T13:03:00.001+08:00

Back from camp again.

Cool.

Awesome.

Yea.

I feel things drifting apart. I seriously hope not.

2008-06-10T22:21:00.003+08:00

Mum's nagging got to me.
Dad's sarcasm got to me.
Their quarrels got to me.
Bro's irritating character got to me.
I wonder what's wrong with me.
Getting so edgy these days.
So i left the house for some peace and quiet.
Then it rained.
How true.
The rain is falling.
My heart is crying.
I miss you.
I need someone to talk to.
1800-WHERE-ARE-YOU.
heck.
drenched.
walked home slowly
i need sleep.
waking up at 5.30 tomorrow.
I can't wait for YISS.
really.
I can't wait to get away from the house.
Yet my bed will be sorely missed.
One more day tomorrow to pack, settle last minute stuffs.
Shit. She will leave tomorrow for camp.
Oh hell.
Work Work homework.
What a way to burn away the time.
This sucks ass.
In life, that fucking cert matters.
Without it. You have nothing.
You are nothing.
No Money.
No Life.
No Girl.
Just Crap.
Yeap. Things doesn't get any better.
Especially when your own family looks down on you.
Fuck it all.
Worthless.
I know.

2008-06-10T15:01:00.004+08:00

Had school today.
Boring Social Studies.
Well, break day break day.
Camp on the 12th to 15th.
Well, heard that it will be great.
Hope so.
I think i need a great spiritual uplifting.
This week is camping week sia.
Many people have many different camps..
Haven't got much to say..
Drop a sms if u wanna find me from 12th to 15th of June.
Well, supposed to have met someone.
I miss you!!
Have fun for your camp.
See you 5 days later.
Teen Games tomorrow.
Well, i shall try my best.
Hopefully i don't screw up tomorrow.

Tears are falling,
Braincells are dying.
What's next. Me?
I feel damn pissed off.
Fuck it.
Why is it happening.
And i though things were getting better.
Heck, I don't wanna bother.

Update more later.

2008-06-08T21:45:00.001+08:00

Let the tears fall.
I can't take it anymore.
Why do things keep coming?
Let them fall..Let it all fall..

2008-06-08T16:25:00.001+08:00

Today was nuts.
I don't know what i am thinking.
I don't know what was the point of my actions, words etc..
I think i am just hurting myself for no reason.
Its just my thinking, i know it.
Yet i let it affect me so much.
It feels so dumb of me.
After so many other things swallowed, I let these poison my mind.
Crap. Pure crap.
Fuck it, i am screwing up everything with nothing.
I know it. I just know it. Yet, I am letting things happen.
Sigh.
Sometimes i realise that no matter how hard people try to avoid or swallow things.
It hurts yourselfs more. Heck.
I have to stop all these now.
I don't even know who i am already.
Church today was completely off for me.
I wasn't there in spirit.
Fuck.
Someday I'll hold you again
And you'll look in my eyes the way you used to,
And you'll see life and reality,
love and believability,
truth and consistency.
Maybe tomorrow?
Maybe..

2008-06-07T23:45:00.003+08:00

Back from camp, somethings just not right with me, i am sorry.
ugh. someone save me from all this worries anxieties and insecurities.
paranoid dude. paranoid. heck. its nothing big.
camp was ok. yea. i suppose that's that.
lazy to post pics. shan't bother.
bye.

2008-06-07T23:32:00.002+08:00

Instructions: remove 1 question from below and add in your personal question den tag 8 people in your list, list them out in the end of this post.
Notify them in their chatbox that he'she has been tagged.
Whoever does the tag will have a blessing from all.

Q1: Do you like your present school?
A1: HA HA HA you are kidding me.

Q2: What do you want the most now?
A2: that security instead of insecurity.

Q3: Who is the closest person to you in your school?
A3: erm.. honestly, i have no idea. its either too many friends OR none of them are THAT close.

Q4: Do you love your friends?
A4: yes, as long as they love me too. haha. nothing to complain about right?

Q5: Are you afraid of death?
A5: depends on what death i am going to have.

Q6: What is your goal this year?
A6: i have no idea. seems pointless in having any anyway.

Q7: Who would you probably spend the rest of your life with?
A7: only god knows. though i do hope that it is her.well, one thing's for sure. i am spending it with myself

Q8: What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
A8: its a secret

Q9: Do you find life meaningless?
A9: sometimes.

Q10: What do you live for?
A10: still searching for an answer.

Q11: Who do you talk most to in school?
A11: lol, sounds erm not me but yea. GOD.

Q12: What are you listening to now?
A12: ...my bro's noisy tv program.

Q13: Who i like? (the changed question)
A13: haven't said this in a while..Rachel Lim Xp.

Tag 8 people!
1. Myself
2. T.M.G
3. Terrence
4. Terrence Michael
5. Michael Giam
6. Terrence Giam
7. Terrence Michael Giam
8. Yan Zhong Ming

P.S wait till i think of who to do. promise the list will be up soon..

2008-06-04T21:06:00.001+08:00

ultimate freak show at jp in the afternoon.

sorry dear.

haha. super embarrasing.

well, orchard after that. movie.

home.

camp tomorrow.

i will miss my blanket.

i will miss my dearest.

cya when i'm back people

2008-06-03T11:07:00.005+08:00

ahhhh..

groundation. the process in which one is being grounded.

so yea. i am currently undergoing groundation for the day.

because i went out the whole day yesterday.

well, what to do. you get some you lose some.

life people.

well, funeral tomorrow morning.

shucks. i miss weddings. they have reception.

lol. KRISTON!

walao. i tell u ah. their reception is posh like posh.

and their food is great like great.

haha. shit. i backlogged quite abit of stuff.

gotta start working on them.

ahhhh, should be bringing some work to camp.

its just thursday and i can't bear to leave my home.

crap, i will miss my blanket. haha.

oh well.

laisser le camp aller et venir rapidement alors i va voir mon aimé un bientôt

oh i miss you

P.S. there is no such word as groundation. lol. i think there isn't

2008-06-02T23:40:00.001+08:00

ohmygosh.

had a fantastic day today.

2008-06-01T17:57:00.002+08:00

Ain't-so-shiok-day

Yay! Today is the day.

She is coming back.

Heck, was supposed to meet her but then i think tomorrow would be better.

suffering from lack of sleep,

especially plus-ing the misses

and other thoughts on my mind.

church-ed the whole day.yea. SFA to SJC and back to SFA.

goodness, i saw nick. misses!

haha. the first thing he said when he saw me at SJC was, "what the fuck are you doing here?"

lol.lol.lol.

super lol.

haha. ok la. anw today is the 6th month. i am waiting for your return, my dearest.

endless months ahead.

cya people around.

2008-05-31T15:09:00.002+08:00

31st of May

Time really flies,

one blink of the eye,

here we are at the end of the month

tomorrow is the 1st.

haha.

man. let the holidays pass at a nice speed.

like. erm.

slow but fast

whatever. camp is 5 days away.

hell. its just tomorrow.

haha.

misses and loves!

take care people.

2008-05-30T14:16:00.003+08:00

official reason for absence of school today for terrence michael : SICK

time flies, tomorrow some idiot is going batam. hah!

Ayam penyat. lol.

man. recently i have been finding lots of information on this and that.

kinda surprises me. the world is changing.

bored with this world.

then again, its kinda happening. sense the irony?

i don't know how to explain this but yea.

that's how it is.

and for some reason i find arial font so nice.

could be the practical.

excessive obsession with arial font.

lol.

yay! 5th june is coming

much to the dismay of some people, i have to go to camp.

then after which YISS is 13 DAYS AWAY! haha.

oww shucks!

another 4 days gone.

total days which i am gone.. 7 days and 5 nights.

yeap 5 nights.

3 days 2 nights camp from the 5th to the 7th.

4 days 3 nights camp from the 12th to the 15th

hoho. after which "back to school" means.

perlim examinations.

major eaxminations.

sickening. well, can't really complain.

shucks. have a safe trip. i will miss u.

cya!

and i am sorry i cant see you before you go. i really am

2008-05-29T17:08:00.002+08:00

The week is almost over!

yay! tomorrow is the last day of the week's remedial.

camp is almost here.

Its just next week.

Sadly, someone is going off to Batam.

Walao.. i am so gonna miss you.

come back safely dearest.

should be heading out later to church or something.

i just have many TYS(s) and loads of past years papers to complete.

heck. holidays my ***.

haha.cya people.

1st of june is so gone.

where's that courage. fuck it.

2008-05-28T19:33:00.006+08:00

yes..Finally my computer studies practical is officially over.

finally. phew. still school till the end of the week.

how sickening is that..

and it ends late.

that sucks.

the most freaking retarded thing happened

and i have to call that dog owner.

sucks.

lol. ok. had a late night yesterday.

was out till 11 plus with ralph,julia and gabrielle.

home and phone-ed till 1.30.

haha. smth happened.

it may just never happen again.

i dunno. just maybe. lol.

psp rocks my life.

but rachel rocks more.

then. whatelse.

erm. nothing.

lol.cya.

haha. yay! 4 more days. loves!

2008-05-27T19:17:00.001+08:00

swallow all that in u terrence.

u know that's the only way.

fuck it. fuck this feeling.

fuck everything.

2008-05-27T17:06:00.002+08:00

ok..i have been screwing up too much things already.

today was as good as normal school day... _|_

went in the morning at 8.30 came back after 4.

tomorrow will also be the same.

the following day will see me end after 2.

what the hell is wrong with the world.

i need rest like seriously.

loads of things to do.

sian. camps come quick.i need rest.

and those stacks of papers just keep coming for every subject.

wanna see them?!

its almost as good as one TYS book per subject.

stack by stack. within 1 month.

great. i shall bring them to camp with me.

thats how sick it is.

she is one stupid girl to stick with me

*sigh*

what to do.?

i love you.

2008-05-25T15:55:00.002+08:00

I need a nap.

It hasn't been a smooth 5 months for me.

Although there are happy moments etched.

There are also scars.

Before i turn the tide for the next semester

I need a rest.

but the holidays seemed packed.

well, let's see how.

church was great.

choing-ed half-day.

lol. man.

father michal going back poland.

sian. 1 month eh.

walao. have a safe trip!

god bless!

cya people.god bless!

i miss you.6 more days.

2008-05-24T23:31:00.002+08:00

okok..english post after 2 precious posts in french.

well, results were generally ok i guess.

still loads of work which needs catching up.

my holidays are burnt.

like woah..chao ta! and they said it was a holiday. fug.

well, what to do. at sec 4 things change.

and my dear girl is feeling sick again.

take care please.

oh..something...

i said no.i have her.

that's enough.

she is way better then you.

i love her.bye.

oh let the winds bear me in their breeze.

7 more days.

i love you.

2008-05-23T23:40:00.000+08:00

Aujourd'hui était un culot-démolition moment. Avant i obtenu mon rapport livre, i était nerveux comme enfer. Après i obtenu mon rapport livre, i était lumière comme des diables. lol. il a été chanceux. i sais moi même, qui a été 50 % chance. àd, nous espérons i peut faire la même de décision et les grandes sociétés. église après que. basket après église. et i manquer déjà, i ne devrait pas avoir montré! 8 jours de plus cher. i vous aiment plus ensuite hier.

haha.

cya guys around. happy holidays.

can't wait for 1st june

2008-05-22T17:08:00.000+08:00

Révoltant journée.

La moitié du temps i a penser à beaucoup de choses.

J'aime vraiment vous et i promesse i va jamais laisser vous estiment que plus jamais.il y a certains problèmes de ma part, i regrette.

Soyez forte parce que i vraiment besoin de vous être.

Je vous aime.

2008-05-21T19:21:00.001+08:00

Sleep and sleep and more sleep.

no directions anymore.

i feel myself drifting further form everything.

i don't intend to do anything.

bye.bye.

Worth? or Worthless?

2008-05-20T12:00:00.004+08:00

such a boring day.
i am now in school slacking on a laptop.
nothing to do.
heck. i woke up tired and was nearly late for school. ( i took a taxi)
something just does not feel right.
i hate being paranoid la.
well, some things just tend to bother me.
had one hell of a WEEKEND
it was good. haha. plus i got my handphone back.
haha. well, it's the last week of school!
yay?
haha yes, the question mark.
happy or sad?
i feel as if there is nothing worth looking forward to during the holidays.
camps? maybe.
more "vacation" school is inevitable.
so i suppose my JUNE schedule will be damn packed.
just great. packed. perhaps in a bad way.
no rest.
YESTERDAY
was ultimate boredom.
imagine serving tennis balls for 3 hours.
well, lol. the whole world seemed busy yesterday.
there were people who were out dating.
one bunch here and there, at cinemas and fast food joints.
some people were enjoying the sun in East Coast.
yea. lol. actually it felt great to be alone.
like perfect solitude.
tranquility. sounds so i-dunno-what. intellectual?
and my wallet is almost empty now.
tennis racket bought.
6 taxi rides yesterday.
and i didn't even bother to take a bus yesterday.
not once.
heck. i think i better start saving up.
i have been spending too much these days.
oh yea. psp ain't boyfriend stealers.
they steal the boyfriends' attention.
AFTER SCHOOL
ok this is where i continue from where i left.

i reached home.

yea, and i am sick of this place.

seriously, i can go on and on.

but its not gonna solve anything
neither do i feel obliged to do anything

i am so tired already.

shall sleep early tonight.

i can feel the weariness getting to me.

tired physically and mentally.

and when it happens, you can feel everything in life.

every single bit of worry, relief, sadness, happiness.

its that simple.

well, not quite.

heck. sometimes when i continue

such worthless words can just fill up one whole page.

paranoid. paranoid.

what on earth am i doing?

anxieties, fears and worries.

thats so like in the eucharistic prayer during mass.

still, what's these insecurities i am feeling.

paranoid. its all in my mind.

get out please.

mental torture ain't good.

busy week ahead i guess.

report books on friday. haha

and i don't know how to end this post anymore.

at a loss of words. wait till i think of something.

Maximum Limit

2008-05-17T16:56:00.003+08:00

Feeling sick today.

Church-ed.

Night time

dinner at restaurant.

oww..

i am beginning to miss my hp.

because of that.

i can't get news and information.

i can't contact and relay messages.

most impt.

i miss her!!!

ugh..fuck.

eh dumbass.

see this wait for my call hor.

lol.

2008-05-16T23:17:00.003+08:00

School and Church is starting to clash.

Friends and other friends are starting to fall apart.

Lucky i am standing in the middle, yet unlucky too.

The perfect irony of life.

haha.

okok. i think whining is good for people like me.

haha. it makes me feel good for awhile.

but it kinda sucks after.

i wanna drive.

i wanna earn 5 figure salary.

i wanna own big house.

yes yes!

june's coming.

CAMPS!

but handphone's not back.

oh my! what if i am in my camps, but no handphone?!

shit! fuck!

i need my bloody phone. ugh!

sickening.

i love myself!

let's take a ride and see the stars.

let's stay awake and watch the sunrise.

let's love like never before.

hold me close and we shall soar!

i love dearest!

2008-05-16T14:44:00.000+08:00

Don't be too down with your results people.

haha.

That includes you my dear.

support u need.

support you get.

haha..

just let me know.

i know u'ill be fine.

loves R!

2008-05-15T19:19:00.002+08:00

Haha. Exams are over. Results are out! Praise God!

Oww.. I want a Hug! ok..

because of a phone call yesterday

i nearly reached school late.

but then i dun care.

life's a bore.

i miss my rach!

haha. lots of juicy gossips in school.

caught up with ex-classmates.

man. more then half the class attached.

and some even to each other.

LOL.it rocks to be 6teen.

haha.so when's my love coming home?

no school jiu luan luan pao..zzz..

haha.

cya guys around.

see that pic up there!

AMPLIFY FUEL UP FRIDAYS ARE HERE!

YISS IS MY DESTINATION!

CAN'T WAIT!

SEE YA!

2008-05-14T18:06:00.001+08:00

Day of smiles and tears.

happy to say..finally i find myself smiles side.

haha.

i passed..woohoo. lol.. but then again.

failed a couple of screwed up subs.

lol. but. expected.

haha.

well.

i want to go to poly ok.

haha.

no handphone really sucks.

2008-05-13T17:19:00.002+08:00

results will be released tomorrow.

heck. i actually am getting nervous.

what if i screwed it up.

gosh. nonononono.

must not screw up.

must not must not....

LOL.

hp confiscated.see u people online.

haha. sorry la..don't dial that 1800 hotline la.

freaking cute eh.

1800-WHERE-R-U

1800-HERE-LOVING-U

2008-05-12T22:55:00.002+08:00

today was an ok day i guess.

slept alot and ate alot.

bball-ed in the evening.

cool.

tired.

and there's school tomorrow.

what crap seh..

other schools have exams.

ending early or holidays.

not fair.

haha..

afternoon was off for both of us i guess.

but i'm glad it turn out well, i am sorry for my part.

and i love you la.

this is just stupid of you ok.

next time let me know and i will be there like how i was today.

you know i will be there as long as u need me.

as long as you find me!

haha..and joshua..zzz...take him la..zzz..

haha..loves r! loves r! loves r!

2008-05-12T12:05:00.002+08:00

In sch right now, this is boring.
Surfing for information for Computer Studies practical.
Bored.
I want R
I miss R.
I wanna see R!
haha. stupid girl, physics goneeeeee
haha. ok. this is boring, suffering from lack of sleep.
soon i am gonna look like a human panda.
pandas are cute, but human pandas?
they seem as if their eyes are swollen
and their eyes seem to be popping out.
Facial expression makes them look constipated.
haha. effing random.
haha. chilling.

2008-05-11T22:11:00.002+08:00

run together with me if you want. i wanna leave this hell once and for all.

Happy Mother's Day

2008-05-11T18:59:00.002+08:00

HAHA.

MOTHERS DAY.

LOL.

then?

mothers day lor

lol

sunday routine!

church and stuff.

haha. then dinner at home.

freaking tired la....

haha.

nothing much to post.

i am suffering from lack of sleep.

on top of it, i was playing alot and staying out late since friday night.

lol. and i was whining about being bored.

irony.

i wanna see R!

2008-05-10T15:37:00.000+08:00

fucked up family.

2008-05-09T23:56:00.002+08:00

GAZING up.
i saw MY angel.
haha.
so NEAR yet so FAR.
but still.
it was the most tangible experience so far.
agree?
aha..loves!

2008-05-09T17:01:00.001+08:00

i cant believe it.

haha..

its just so fun to talk to you la.

dumb asssssssss.

haha.

ok.

hougang next stop.

terence's place the following stop.

haha.

cya people.

i got a long weekend ahead.

no school till tuesday.

ow...stop being jealous dear.haha.

its so bloody obvious.

ilrilrilr

2008-05-08T13:38:00.002+08:00

I feel myself slipping away~

heck.

exams over anw..yay!

major ones still coming up, prelims too.

sian.

slipping away~

hold on to me please.

selfish.

i have become.

distorted in spirit.

i have become.

attention i crave.

whos gonna give.

short-tempered.

getting shorter.

backwards.

thats where i am heading

oh heck.

Exaltation

2008-05-07T17:33:00.003+08:00

Raining in the morning.

Raining in the afternoom.

Maybe it will rain to in the night.

Tumble and Fall.

Crumble and Sink.

I won't budge. I have made my stand.

Decisions could cause us dearly.

Haha.

Let's wait and see what that bugger would come up with.

Today was boring.

Woke up at 11.

haha. others were in school. lol.

Last paper tomorrow!

Chem Chem Chem......siannnnn

Its the final turn, who is with me?

Funny when i think about it.

Getting drunk in the morning.

fucking hilarious.

its must be your fucked-up brains.

haha.ilrlzh!

2008-05-06T15:15:00.004+08:00

take me up to the heavens with you!

lets all talk small today.
because i am sick of people who keep talking....
BIG
i saw an angel today! it was in my test paper.
oh my gosh..seriously man, ever since i entered secondary school.
this was the first time maths ever felt so easy.
haha. maybe i shall try talking...

BIG!
I THINK MATHS CAN GET DISTINCTION!

hope so la..haha.. who doesn't wanna get!
yea..............so near yet so farrrrrr................
i hate jp. sometimes i just want it to shrink laaaaaa...
lol. then maybe finding you wouldn't be so difficult!
haha.
okok. time count.
exams paper left= 1 more!
hahahhahahahhahahahahahahah
days left=3 more!
yea 3! which means!
haha. 2 days no need to go school! shiok seh.
someonne's jealous. haha.
maybe i could give you a surprise.lol.

man, i am starting to feel so pissed with myself.
can't i have more confidence in certain areas of life?
lol. *shakes head in disbelief*
i just can't believe it.

Fallible

2008-05-05T15:25:00.002+08:00

Goodness gracious me.

Papers after papers.

This is sickening.

Well, studies do matter. Haha.

Geography was ok after all.

Computer Studies.

Oh My Goodness-ly Crappy-ly

Beyond Words.

Haha. 2 hours and 30 mins for one bloody paper.

I practically snoozed and dreamt in dreamland =X.

haha. 1 hour doing it, 45 minutes snoozing. haha

completed the 2nd half in the remaining time.

I can't wait already. 9th May come quick please.

Haha. Someone ends on the 14th.

Bored leh.

Someone entertain me leh.

Not with rubbish and crap though.

What Nonsense la..

Fallible.

What am i doing?

2 lines spread apart.

I am caught between its paths.

Ultimate Random.

Let me know we're always together.

I'm thankful to God for he gave me to you.

And your special love pure and true.=X

Ethics

2008-05-04T21:26:00.003+08:00

Today went ok.
diarrahoe in the morning la.
sickening shit. 3 times in 20 minutes.
ok..thats gross. haha.
chionging post.
someone la..ask me update.
haha. love u love u love u.
ugh..exams..
sickening.
memory space stretched to the limits.
all education's fault.
haha.
wait..i am lost. i wanted to say smth. forgot.
ugh..erm..hmm..
yea..nothing much i guess..
wish me luck people.
papers suckkkkkkkk!

p.s haha.it must be the 9 hours we had ytd. ."sickening"eh..

2008-05-03T13:35:00.003+08:00

There are many things i want to do now.

Exams. Sick shit.

Can't wait for everything to be over.

1) Camps in June!

-Youth Leaders Retreat in the first week.

5th to 8th if i am not wrong or 6th to 9th.

-YISS!!!

finally man.

12th to 15th June.

-MOA servers camp.

16th to 18th June.

its crazy i know. and probably i might not go for the hat-trick.

see how it goes ba. hope my mid-year results are good. then. it will easy!

haha.

2) I have to start preparing for the major exams at the end-of the-year.

ugh..sick but yes.. preparation.

3) 9th July.

4) 3rd October.

5) haha. someone is waiting for me to do something.

it will be done.

Well. Saturdays are relatively free for me. No outings today.

Though have to be in church by 7.30pm for practice.

Haha. I don't want to give up my com though,

its so nice to just slack and spend the whole day in front of it.

With someone to talk too. ^^ .

I love R.

ohh..i need my shoes real badly.

The bloody dumb bro of mine went and spoil it.

Fug.

And i am getting broke at the rate i am spendin money.

Taxi, Food, Taxi, and i have to get those shoes again.

Great.

haha..rachel rachel rachel!

ahh..record broken..9 hours on msn..

lol..not bad leh hor..next time we try for 10!

hahaa..

ilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilrilr

i really really really love R!

fug off fag!

2008-05-03T13:33:00.000+08:00

You are unworthy. Your sins are unforgivable. You don't know how to go on. You are hopeless. You are defeated. The world has won.

You are wrong.

Amplify Ministry invites all youths and young adults to the 19th Youth in the Spirit Seminar. This unique encounter has been a defining moment in the lives of many. The YISS is a 4-day stay-in retreat where, through reverent worship, insightful talks and introspective sharings, many young people have revived their relationship with God and refreshed their lives in Him.

Come.

"For you were once in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light."
Ephesians 5:8

"Rise up in splendour! You light has come, the glory of God shines upon you."
Isaiah 60:1

The YISS is for youths aged between 16 to 30, held from 12 to 15 June 2008, at Catholic Spirituality Centre (CSC), 1261 Upper Serangoon Road S534769

For more details, please contact either:

Rachel : 91055718
Florence : 97534856

or email us at youthinthespiritseminar@gmail.com

See you soon,
Amplify Ministry

2008-05-02T14:57:00.001+08:00

ONE THING TO SAY.

http://www.lmcc.net/blog/gallerybar.jpg

2008-05-01T20:08:00.002+08:00

i love u
i know u know how i feel.
still i wanna say i trust u.
happy 5 mths
stay close. hold me tightly and never go

Ecstacy

2008-04-29T16:26:00.003+08:00

*laughs*
man. i am happy as hell. i dunno why.
*laughs*
haha. haha. haha.
normal lessons today, boreddddd.
same for tomorrow.
can't wait for friday's paper.
then weekends.
OH.
before that. 1st may!
5 mths 5 mths.
ECP. lol.
Ascension Day. Church too.
heck.. what am i talking about.
oh i miss you.
ILR

2008-04-28T18:11:00.003+08:00

haha..sweet rightttttttttt...

lol...till electrolysis do us apart.

and i dont care even if the bedsheets are changed.

chinese paper is woohoo.

like carisse says.. GONEEE

ugh..gone in a pretty bad way..

can pass though..

but the marks will be o.m.g. "great"

bballed the afternoon away.

sian leh. normal curriculum tomorrow.

sickening shit.

see u in the morning Xy,

slap your doggy face.

si wang cai!

ILR ILR ILR ILR ILR-2 more days=X

Tired

2008-04-27T19:03:00.001+08:00

i really am tired.
words are a double-edged sword.
i understand.
yet i can't figure out what i am doing.
heck. i am sorry.
it feels as if i am waiting for someone who will never arrive.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2008-04-27T18:27:00.003+08:00

where's that missing link?
Sundayyy..Sundaeeee...
ice-cream..
feel the heat man..
it was past 30 degrees outside..
sick to the max.
headache the whole fucking day..
didn't sleep the whole damn night..
now i am better..
but i wouldn't bother..
tomorrow's chinese.
i am feeling english..
there are things i cant comprehend
levels after level,
they plagued me.
still, who i am to bother?
better off knowing nothing.

one word frees us of all the weight and pain in this world.
that word is love.
there is no remedy for love but to love more.
it will double your joy and divide your sorrows.
This makes it the only happiness in life.
to love others and be loved.
That would mean that both will be in one mind and soul.
in two bodies.
Love is indeed powerful.
it can destroy everything as well.
It can also be a sweet and tangible experience.

man..can't believe all these all from my school dairy..
i just have to find it..

Sorry
Let me fade away,
i'm tired, wake me up some other day.

2008-04-27T00:24:00.002+08:00

sail. far away.

out in the ocean. casting worries aside.

static. pain. ecstacy.

nightmare. a dream nevertheless.

wake up. reality.

its a cruel life. alas. its real.

waited. alas. no.

home. online.

the night is peaceful.

beckoning.

sleep soon.

2008-04-25T15:10:00.002+08:00

lol.super nice pic.

depicts alot..

the negative way

haha.

english paper was sick.

especially passage B.

but yea..could have done better la.

but gd enough.

haha..she she she!

lol.wait for me.

i will pick u up soon.

2008-04-24T21:32:00.002+08:00

aren't the northen lights beautiful?

i read about them in physics eh.

lol. i actually studied.

well. becoz someone wanted to wait for me in poly so yea.

sian. lol.

this picture was taken from some poster website.

i think www.allposters.com or something like that.

well, eng paper starts tomorrow

and i am proud to announce that i am completely unfazed.

lol.

i don't know if thats a good thing or a bad thing.

well..

there are good things happening in my life.

there are also bad things happening.

ugh..

stress seh.

lol.i know i don't look like it but yea.

NAN MIAN DE.

hard to avoid la.

especially when you are a teenager.

sometimes you can't help but feel helpless.

ok. sch was ok, and i got my progress report card.

hah. aced it.

lol. thats something great.

yea. then again, quarrels and naggings just totally pisses me off.

GREAT!

haha. she said she didnt say she did not want to.

haha. i realised it meant that she didn't say she wanted to.

sadly,there are somethings i hope will never happen.

maybe its me without confidence but i guess she will understand

haha. yes. but i realised sometimes she is the best person around.

haha.iloveher=x

2008-04-23T17:24:00.002+08:00

lighten me up.

i can feel things slipping.

its just a random feeling.

haha.

school wasn't great.

i knew i passed physics finally, but i still know i suck.

exams start this friday, stressed out.

weeeee

i am not the only one being stressed to the max.

many others too.

friends and family. to me, all this is splitting away and apart from me.

yay! weekends are in sight.

haha..soon terrence soon.

LOL.7-8 more days to 5 months.

haha.=x

oh ya..spotcheck..sick thing.

shan't bring my hp to school for awhile.

lucky to escape today.

must protect this important mean of communication to my dearest!

2008-04-22T19:20:00.002+08:00

a clear mind.

a wishing heart.

a distant dream.

i have a post i written in the morning during the 3 free periods.

yea. and 4 more free periods after recess.

ahaha.so yea.. headache and tired.

someone msged me during physics.

during bball match and probably later.

haah.take care la idiot. headache.

zzz.

rest well. and please. dun make physics another chemistry

Ebulience

2008-04-21T18:39:00.003+08:00

interesting pic i found while googling images. i think it was also on someone's wordpress.

sorry ar. no credits. but its somewhere like i mentioned above.=x

school was completely not like school.

slept for the first 5 periods and replied smses

then recess,

then assembly,

then something like a free period and replying of smses

then came real studying and replying of smses

haha..oh my endorphin.

i love you la.

silly girl. what would i do without you.

ok. so i aced my english focused test.

yay! something to be proud of.

since i seldom got the chance.

haha. and it has been raining leh.

sickening? in a way, but it doesn't really bother me.

unfailing love.

its powerful.

cheers! =X

2008-04-20T21:54:00.002+08:00

My heart is crying in exasperation.

Call it hyper sensitivity.

I think i am fine, but whats this excruciating pain within?

Sometimes i wonder would it be best if i walked away.

I know you would be better off without me.heck.

i dunno what i am saying.

don't mind me.

Reminiscence

2008-04-20T17:18:00.010+08:00

Sunday was pretty much a routine as usual.

Church in the morning,

Lunch, home.

Home. Yea. boring place to be now. i can't stand living there.

not that i can't but its just freaking pushing me to the limits.

i can feel the pressure and the expectations.

oh fuck it.

can i just leave this damn place?

Reminiscence.

Thinking of the past,

yet walking straight into the future.

What's the point in pondering so much?

Ok. Now i have a bad feeling about everything.

Its just so me to be such an Ahole thinking about negative things.

Well. I cant help it.

School tomorrow,

Exams start on Friday.

I don't even know what i am doing.

I can't even tell whether i

am looking forward to school or not.

For once. I think i am.

Cry hard.

That was how one could feel better.

Lie on a shoulder.

That was what one could feel better too.

and what if u were crying on the inside.

and there is no one to be found.

What would you do?

My dear friend, you know she's not your all.

That's Life.

I don't know what else i have to say to you.

Let's face it, women are nothing but a cause of depression at times.

Shattered Glass,

Who would pick me up?

Who would piece them back.

Fragile and small.

It seems almost impossible.

Fuck it. Who would bother?

2008-04-19T22:09:00.002+08:00

When i fall in love, it would be foreverrrrrrrrrrr...................

ITS GOTTA BE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.............

Y M C AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

well..speech day was over, it wasn't fantastic. it was great.

yea..

well..

the important thing was dinner.

heck..i cant believe ppl got so blind..

walk past twice..

once shoulder to shoulder somemore cannot see..

blind or what..lol.

the other time stand infront for quite awhile.

haiis..eating like a pig la..cannot blame..

then came the decision making shit..man..

why couldnt u make the dicision, frap.

i am such an idiot.

Thoughts

2008-04-19T12:40:00.004+08:00

Amplify's session yesterday was wonderful.

Josie was very enlightening yesterday.

I realise that i have had too many things on my mind.

and the last thing i needed was to think off-track at times

had a nice chat with issac.

everyone's been busy with work and school.

cool.i seem unfazed by everything and to think exams next week.

haha.i think i'm so gonna pass chemistry. hahahahahaha.

speech day concert later.almost all my friends will be involved in a way or another.

haha..good luck people. especially sis. she's nervous like hell. jiayou la. haha.

how beautiful is your unfailing love.

"Everything you hold in your hand, yet you still make time for me, I don't understand."

-Chris Tomlin

2008-04-18T14:42:00.002+08:00

Guess where this came from, it definately did not come from me.

haha..amplify later..i missed 2 sessions already. haah..must go must go.!

speech day tomorrow.yay! eh the band is great! the choir's great! the parade contingent is great!

no wonder redcross.npcc.ncc.BB. all get gold..and ncdcc on the way to one soon.

walao..pity our school got alot of wierd people.

man..this is so depressing..someone forgot my birthday..haha...random shit..ugh.!

haah.

2008-04-17T20:49:00.004+08:00

whats this feeling thats so strong?
its overwhelming me..
i can feel it..the helplessness.loneliness.
its just sucking the life out of me.
i cant figure out why.
who will be there to revive my drooping spirit?
ugh. its pain? fuck it.
i dunno what is it.

2008-04-17T17:26:00.001+08:00

ok..today was a day of conflicts and problems.

in short. a fucked up day for everyone.

heck.. all this sensitivity is getting to me..

maybe its killing off more braincells..

damn..

2008-04-15T18:42:00.002+08:00

Back on Monday which was yesterday, there was this thing about self-esteem and other values going on in assembly. Couldn't really figure it out, but i realised everything and everyone was listening. There was this sense of reality and it. i don't know quite the way to put it, but i felt that it was all so real. yea. haha. its just my random thoughts on this issue i guess.

everyone is stepping up their engines for the exams.
i wonder whether i am fueled up or not. i feel so listless, so restless,so slack.
i seem to know my own problem, and i am not doing anything yet i claim that i want to.
procrastination.
haha. god knows what i am doing.

2008-04-15T16:04:00.002+08:00

boom boom boom!
ahhhhhhhhhhh!
lol.
feelin cranky..
tuesday's the only day i have off.
after sch i am freeeeeeee...
heck..so what..
porbably will be stuck doing some shit.
great.
my com is lagging again..
hurray!
wad nonsense.=.=
haha..someone's alone right now on the way to woodlands.
faster go and come back..
idiot..
haha..see la..spoil your phone somemore?
haha. i bet the first thing she does when she gets back her phone is
take pictures.
faster la.i'm missing u alrdy

2008-04-14T17:38:00.004+08:00

changed my blog song.
nice eh this one.
lol.
imeem will just lag my com la..sick..
some idiot is sick.
shan't bother.(tried but failed miserably)
haha
well.
sch was ok.
can't wait to graduate.
cca is officially over.
yes yes yes.
haha.
man.i am becoming sick too.
flu..cough..
ugh..
__ sinus.
and to some idiot.
you're my sweetest silliest dearest girl.RLZH..silly you.ily and i'm not angry

2008-04-13T22:15:00.001+08:00

the more things seem to get better.
the more i feel insecure.
the more i feel insecure,
the more i feel the strain.
and thats where the thought comes.
tell me you won't go.tell me.

2008-04-13T21:16:00.001+08:00

Sunday routine.
church in the morning.
then training.
then sian..
snoozed the whole afternoon.
basketball in the evening.
then home.

haha.
imissyou=x

2008-04-12T17:28:00.003+08:00

saturday? yea..pretty much snoozed the whole day.
someone's out.
i am not.
probably later.
frap.
the keyboard is coming apart.

take it back.
take everything back.
i dun want to stay this way.
i dun want to live this life.

When the music fades and all is stripped away

And I simply come

Longing just to bring something that's of worth

That will bless Your heart

I'll bring You more than a song

For a song in itself

Is not what You have required

You search much deeper within

Through the way things appear

You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship

And it's all about You

All about You, Jesus

I'm sorry, Lord, for the things I've made it

When it's all about You

All about You, Jesus

King of endless worth, no one could express

How much You deserve

Though I'm weak and poor, all I have is Yours

Every single breath

lord i pray that you would grant me the strength and wisdom to continue down this path.
open my eyes to seek the direction that i should go.

haha.dummy.its good i don't have a cousin whos out to get me.i am free to post as i like.Xp

2008-04-12T02:41:00.000+08:00

i miss dearest.
in terence's house.
lol. terrence in terence's house.
spot the difference.
haha.
P.S LOL

2008-04-10T17:08:00.002+08:00

8.45am
Chemistry Lesson.

i sat in the lab for chemistry
feeling extremely bored.
Mdm tan is teaching about crude oil.
can't be bothered.
loads of things on my mind.
luckily it will end in 5 mins.
i think i am killing my braincells.
heck.i need my endorphin.

10.00am
Maths lesson/CME

Maths just ended.I feel that i can multi-task man.
I could day-dream. draft my post and yet everything
the teacher said got into my head.
big time achievement.Not bad at all.
Man..This is a big worry.
damn.

1.55pm
SS/end of sch.

Damn la..
chinese test and followed by social studies test.
its 4 periods straight and i dun even have time to catch my breath
4 periods =2 hours 20mins by the way.
super sick la.
i need endorphin-x.
and then end of sch.not quite comp studies lesson till 3.30.
skipping lunch obviously.

A little something:
"fate and miracles"
like i said and believed in.
everyone and everything happens or will happen or happened for a reason.
maybe we don't understand.
maybe we can't come to terms with it.
or maybe.we just don't like it.
we are the directors of our own lives.
we plan it.run it.act in it.
miracles do exist.in fact both miracles and fate co-exist together.
i feel that as one grows older, they tend to realise and seek their desires
we as humans grow with emotions and feelings.
this are part of us.
then again, we run it.
we know and probably we may blame it on everything and everyone.
deep down we all know its our fault.
and i myself ponder at times.
what am i doing with my life.
is this my fate and will there be a miracle?
but i understand.i know i have to do things myself.

is this fate or miracle. is this the way our lives are planned or is this just coincidence. are we suppose to meet or is this merely luck. should we walk together or is this fixed. rather this is such miracles that we even get to meet. likewise if things are suppose to be, no matter how hard we try to go against it, things will still be the way it is. we know that others couldnt possibly change things. we know all this isnt just fate, we even know without the minds of wanting things to be, it couldnt most probably be. and most importantly we know we'd even choose the best for ourselves. so whats there to blame when things go wrong, its partially our fault partially not ours. its all a question mark.
-original work by jamie ng-

2008-04-09T17:23:00.002+08:00

bahs.
boring.
exams are around the corner.
shant't talk much.

imissomeone-x
crap.

the thought of exams.
exams.
exams.
its so sickening..
heck la.

2008-04-08T17:21:00.000+08:00

today.tomorrow.the day after.
one day at a time.

terrence is currently treading carefully among the waters.

haha.
whatever..

RANDOM

P.S LOL

2008-04-07T18:59:00.001+08:00

i think i am losing myself.
i need a break.

imissyou
i'm sorry
goodbye

2008-04-04T18:02:00.001+08:00

Sleepwalk; says:

ily ily ily

Sleepwalk; says:

hahah

Sleepwalk; says:

ilyt ilyt ilyt ilyt..

man... life without a phone sucks..

gonna miss you alot..

ahh...

P.S i miss you,ily.

cya soon

2008-04-04T17:10:00.003+08:00

TGIF- Thank God its Friday.

Thank God its Friday.
I get to relax for 2 and a half days.
Just waiting for my mum to be back then i'm off to amplify.
i effing need my phone.
its the bloody weekend la.
Not coming home tonight.
haha. going to friend's place tonight.
he lives near jurong point. a few blocks away from someone's house.
focused test was a blast.
totally aced it.
just to see whether in a good way or a bad way.
haha.
coolness.

i effing miss you.
my endorphin.
my sweetest drug.
my sweetest
silliest
little girl.

a new found addiction-RL♥

2008-04-03T19:15:00.004+08:00

Oh i don't know what is happening.

Everything is happening in a flash.

i can't catch my time.

If only things slowed down.

and waited for me.

I understand some things can't happen like that.

Well, i am praying hard.

and i hope everything can turn out fine.

i flipped through my photos from young till now.

sometimes i can't help but wonder to do with this life of mine.

i have been wasting to much time sometimes.

on things that are not an important part of my future.

As i think and reflect, i know i have strayed too far from many things

Things that are the good, and would ensure a good future for myself.

I dug out my primary sch report book.

and wondered hard, where was this kid now?

There are many things that need to change.

Ranting on down here won't help a single bit.

I can already feel my life slipping away.

It just makes me feel unworthy of many things.

rainnnnnnnnnnnn...

rainnnnnnnnnnnn..

sickening..............

yet i love it...

what ambivalence..lol..

WAS originally alone at home..

but bro came back..ugh..

spoil mood..

haha..

i thought it was romantic to be alone at home..

hahaha..

swing and swing..keep it swinging.......

lalala..

what crap..so random..

ugh...school was oh-so-boring...i nearly fucking died of boredom and headache..

now i'm here. i understood but yet have not put it into action.

i have yet to prove myself.

and i am far from correcting things. But i guess i can.

Realising is a good start.

I feel so happy sometimes when i realise this.

well, things have to be carried out.sooner or later.

and for good reason.things have been getting interesting out there.

haha. suddenly i see the light.

as in. the funny and positive avenues in my life.

brightens out my day sometimes.

its just so interesting.

also.there is the sweetest little silliest girl out there.

who constantly keeps me accompany

and i appreciate her presence alot.

please dun go around and let fly sparks at others.

i don't like that.

haha.joking la.

well. i wouldn't know what to do sometimes if u weren't there.

sometimes cheering up some people can make your day.

Sleepwalk; I ♥ 严忠明

thats the sweetest.cutest.dearest.

P.S ♥ the sugar didn't dissolve.it just got sweeter

2008-04-01T20:06:00.004+08:00

1st April.

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY.

i didn't get fooled by anyone.

except for an sms..sent by some idiot.

haha..a new month already..time really flies..

man..its april already..

haha..

sch as usual.

coughing got horrible like horribly horrible..

nth much to say.

haha..actually someone ask me ps.

lol..then i remembered.today is the 4 mth.

wow..great..bye..haha..to be exact..its 4 mth 1 day..

PS: RACHEL LIM!♥

2008-03-31T18:56:00.002+08:00

Monday Blues?

Nah.

It was a feel-good monday for me.

the weather was cooling.i felt.

only my stupid cough is getting worse.

kept sneezing like mad.

ugh.

couldn't go cca.

i knew i wouldn't be able to take it.

lol.

haha.

sick la..

lol.

tomorrow is tuesday..

YAY! friday is coming.lol.

yea..like 3-4 days from now.

ugh.

cant wait.

nicest.sweetest.dearest.

i miss you =X

2008-03-30T20:26:00.002+08:00

guilt.

heavy word.often too much for one to handle.

what do u perceive it to be?

1)having broken the law or disobeyed a moral or social rule.

2)responsible for something wrong.

3)the knowledge or belief that one has done wrong.

haha.i am fine you are not.

come on.i find no case what-so-ever.

u have broken no law.and u have done no wrong as u are not responsible for things to happen..

and i feel the sense of helplessness.

yet sometimes there are times when u just cant help but feel that way.

its just so vexing.

true.i understand

well.i have said my piece.

written, recorded,sealed.

i am done.

2008-03-30T17:54:00.002+08:00

This isn't sweet

tomorrow is school.

busy day and week ahead.

maybe weekends should be extended.

include fridays!

haha.4-day work week.

i like that.

This is sweet.

Jeremy is going overseas for 2 weeks.

man..dumb gay ass..lol..

haha..

we will miss "mao ren"...

have a safe flight dude.

This is sweeter.

Sunday rocks.i love my god.

"Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He's going to be up all night anyway."

haha.kope from geraldine aunty's msn pm.

lol..style! i like!

This is the sweetest.

haha.

i miss someone.

2008-03-29T22:31:00.000+08:00

NEGATIVE

Retardation got the better of u
Amusingly dumb
Clueless of things
Hopelessly in love with milo
Eccentric
Loves jay but not me.

hahaahahhahahahaha...well well..

OH-SO-POSITIVE

Radiant
Attractive
Cute
Heart-warming
Eloquent
Lovely

its simply amusing when words can be replaced easily and inserted to fit the initials.
was random-ing and came up with this few things.
haha...all becoz someone wanted to see her name..there you have it.

2008-03-29T21:06:00.000+08:00

FORMAL APOLOGY TO CARISSE CHOO THE GREATEST JIE ON EARTH SORRYYYYYYY

2008-03-29T19:57:00.002+08:00

FRIDAY

School as usual.

bored.

finished my chinese homework..crap..

lol..

amplify again..

i miss that place.

it has been 3 months.

and there has been a couple of changes..

haha..well..

i enjoyed prayer meet.

power sia.

lol.

someone someone slept 12 hours.PIG.

SATURDAY

heck of a day today.easter party with amplify!

man..it was a blast!

worship in the park.

and the creation of "ze pillow"

thats the best la..

food was great.

people were greater.

what more could i ask for.

it was heaven to enjoy myself with them.

rushed back to SFA for ministry work.

novena after that.

home now.

Secret message?

i think not.

it was so darn obvious you idiot.

silly girl.

i miss you.